Rajeev is screwed.

Chapter 5: Your name is Positive, HIV positive

Miss Jolie and lord Ganpati were witnesses to a violent physical fight as the two men got uncontrollable. A final kick on Rajeev s groin triggered his downfall. He was thrown out of the house along with his books and the rest of his luggage. The man was extremely hurt physically and mentally. His love story was still incomplete. Neha didn’t break up with Nandan, but Nandan did break up with Rajeev. May be Nandan and Neha will live together peacefully, “they shouldn’t, she shouldn’t “ Rajeev shouted as he gathered his baggage and could think of only one place he could go, the FCUK Ganpati. Far away he could see Neha through the window, still winking and whispering “For you”. Rajeev’s blood boiled.

“Here’s your room” said Mahesh as he handed a bottle of dettol, cotton and some band aids to Rajeev. The two men spoke about Raj’s miseries over a bottle of Royal Challenge. The whisky tasted bitterer, but it did help in the “move on” process.

“Go on; get some other woman, you are good looking, she s not the only girl in the world. There are other womans.” Mahesh said exhibiting his English speaking skills.

“Women Mahesh, women!” Rajeev corrected signaling him to refill his drink.

“Haan, wohi. Go get some chokris, red street, the road parallel to pahargunj, go straight to the 2^nd house on the right, her name is Kamala Devi, nice figure” Mahesh said winking.

Neha’s curves hurt him more; he had spent five nights with her, five glorious nights. He wanted sex, the batsman in him was in full form and all charged up, all he needed was a pitch and a couple of balls to play with.

“Chal” he said.

“Aaj” asked a worried Mahesh.

“I want to show that bitch she is not the only one and I really need to go.”

“Tu ja” said Mahesh.

Rajeev borrowed five hundred rupees from Mahesh, covered all his wounds with cotton, combed his hair and left. The 21 days that followed meant 23 women. One woman every day, with the exception of Sundays for two. He always preferred the lights to be turned out; he switched his Neha bulb on and let his swimmers out. He tried to find Neha Sharma in every woman he had. He carried a red rose to Red Street every day hoping to find Neha. The women made money, and Rajeev gained experience. Every time the paanwala on the street shouted out “Raj shaab, aaj kitna ?” to which Rajeev signalled one or sometimes two with his fingers.

“Abe, stop now” Mahesh said as he saw Rajeev getting dressed for another encounter with a fake Neha.

“Bimari lagegi, kabhi check kiya ?”

“Check kar le” Mahesh said leaving the room to take an order.

Bimari, disease, Rajeev was shivering; the comb had fallen on the floor.

“Mahesh, Mahesh!, ek minute andar aa” said a frightened Rajeev.

“Dr. Sanjay, I’ve spoken to him already, just go” Mahesh said and handed him a card.

Today, after 2 months and 28 days, lord Ganpati was blessed with the opportunity of seeing Rajeev’s face. The man cried, he wept like a baby. He asked for forgiveness, for a last chance. Nothing moved, everybody remained silent, including the temple bells.

3 hours later

Tears trickled down Rajeev’s face as he read his report, it said HIV positive. Somewhere far all the 24 women including Neha seemed to wink and whisper “for you”. His eyes had turned red as he reached a store that sold guns.

“I need a gun” said the adolescent Rajeev looking discretely into the owners eyes.

“License?”

“Listen! You give me a gun now and if I do what I want to I’ll pay you the amount you ask”

Tonight it seemed the whole world wanted to see Rajeev‘s downfall. The owner agreed. With a red rose in his left hand and the pistol in his right Rajeev walked towards 13^th cross pahargunj. He knocked on the door.

Nandan opened the door; one punch on the neck was enough to put him down unconscious. Neha sat on the couch, shocked.

“You sleep with me tonight or die” Rajeev said displaying both his possessions.

“I don’t want to”

“At gun point you will” Rajeev said pointing the gun to her forehead.

Rajeev was stinking. Neha didn’t have a choice. It was forced love. Rajeev kept laughing every time Neha cried. The pistol was still in his hands. The night passed, Neha woke up to find herself alone on the bed. No pistol, but there was a red rose. A piece of paper was fluttering on the table by the opened window. Neha got up and opened the note to read it.

Sanjay clinic

Rx

Patient name: Rajeev Kumar

Present of HIV in blood: POSITIVE

She looked out of the window, Rajeev stood far away winked at her and whispered “For you!”.

P.S: Thanks Shwetha for the editing! :-)

Rajeev is screwed.

Chapter 4: Rajeev becomes Mohd. Rafi

Two perfectly toned bodies danced to the tunes of unadulterated lust and aggression. Rajeev was tender and the lady aggressive. She wanted him, he needed her. Nandan had been completely forgotten. It was two months back when “Raj” had a life that revolved around books, calculators and theories. The affair was worth the wait. Both looked satisfied, both looked happy, they got dressed, but both were thirsty for more.

The lust escapades had gotten regular. Although Nandan got most of her, Rajeev did enjoy his share. Neha used to be physically tired on certain days, but the woman in her always craved for more. An equal amount of money was now being spent on Maggie and condoms. Rajeev s playlist had also changed. Mohd. Rafi was now a predominant artist. Rajeev s heart was now craving for more than just the three letter word. He wanted to be Mr. Exclusive. His mind was in the commitment mode, he wanted to be committed to Neha, her smile, her eyes and her pink lacy bra.

Rajeev visited the Ganpathi temple after two months to gather all the courage he had. He wanted to tell her today. “Lovely Roses”, a huge board read as Rajeev stood contemplating on which color he wanted to pick.

“Buy red sir” said the salesman.

“Red rose! Hmmm, how much are they?”

“You can pay later if she says yes” said the salesman smiling.

Rajeev smiled, the salesman’s confidence helped increase his confidence by leaps and bounds. Rajeev took a red rose and left saying “Thank you boss!”

“Nandan sir, my name is Nandan" replied the salesman with all smiles.

“Oh!” a shiver ran down Rajeev‘s spine. The color red had changed to being the symbol of danger.

“Good luck sir” wished Nandan.

“Thanks, bye.” Raj hurried back. Rajeev looked his best today. With Nandan’s special rose and lord Ganpati‘s blessings. He climbed the stairs and stood in front of the door smiling. He had already invited Neha, she answered the door bell. He looked at her and she looked at him.

“I love you Neha”

“I love you too Raj” smiled Neha as she took the rose. They both hugged each other and kissed. It was magical.

“Kahan utarna hai?”

“Haan!!?”

“Hello Boss, Kahan utarna hai?” yelled the auto driver.

“Oh! 13^th cross, Pahargunj” Rajeev said smiling. Rajeev came out of his soon to be real dream, as the rickshaw driver dogged his way through the traffic to reach 13^th cross. Meanwhile Raj had decided to change the wallpaper of Nandan‘s computer. It had irritated him from the day he had seen it. The plan was simple in Rajeev’s mind, Neha breaks up with Nandan, he breaks up with Nandan and Rajeev and Neha live happily ever after. His fairy tale excited him and drove him crazy. Rajeev tipped the rickshaw driver five rupees and took the stairs. He held the rose in his right hand and stood in front of the door. Neha answered the door bell.

“Hi Neha”

“Hi Raj” he was still her Raj.

“Listen, I have something to tell you” said Rajeev holding Neha’s hands. She obliged and looked at Rajeev.

“I love you, I really do, I’ve been crazy about you from the moment I saw you. I think we’ll be great together.”

“Hmmm”

“Don’t you think there is great chemistry between us? I mean, for me it was magical”

“Hmmm” replied Neha again.

“Here, this is for you” Rajeev said extending his right hand to give her the rose.

“Thanks” is all she said.

“What do you feel about me?” Rajeev asked.

Neha took two steps back and was now leaning on Nandan’s room door. Her hands moved on the door knob to open it.

“Nandan” she called out to the dark figure that stood behind the door.

Rajeev is screwed.

Chapter 3: Rajeev, the Nucleus.

The day's lectures consisted of a class on the basics of mechanical engineering and electronics. Rajeev got up at 7.30 am, took a shower and got dressed up. The only mirror in the house was in Nandan s room. Rajeev went in, combed his hair, applied some talcum powder and noticed the new wall paper “Neha loves Nandan” on the computer screen.

The electron revolves around the nucleus in a circular path, “As you boys revolve around a beautiful girl” said the professor trying to be funny and like always got nothing but a few girls giggling in response. Rajeev sat in the last second bench and had written “Neha loves Nandan” 112 times. The class concluded with the professor instructing the boys to be a nucleus rather than an electron. Tejpal Gill, the professor , who made those not so funny jokes, the entire college called him TGIF- Tejpal Gill Isn’t Funny.

Rajeev walked back to his apartment thinking about the common dream of his dad and Mr TGIF to be the nucleus around which everybody revolved. Right now Nandan was the nucleus of his life. Everything including Neha revolved around him. Nandan the Nucleus, they even shared the first letter.

Rajeev opened the door and found the hall empty. No Nandan , no loud TV. He went to the kitchen, drank a glass of water and went straight into his room. He threw his bag on the chair and looked around. The Ganpati statue was still on his cupboard and books were neatly arranged, but his priorities were misplaced. The bed was undone; it had never been that way. The pink bra lying told all about what it had played host to. Rajeev stared at the bra for 5 minutes and started sweating. His dad would have had a heart attack if he saw the present scene of his room. Rajeev ran across the hall and locked the door immediately. He went back into the room and held the bra in his hand. That was enough, no Madhuri Dixit, no TV, and no Angelina Jolie,nothing, just the touch of that smooth fabric and Rajeev closed his eyes and let out his swimmers. It was Neha’s.

The guilt feeling engulfed him; he threw the bra away and smelt his fingers. It smelt of lust. He rushed to the bathroom and fiddled to find the best soap that could wash him clean of his guilt. The soaps were always advertised for being anti-germ and not anti-lust. He watched Sanskar TV for the rest of the day.

The clock had ticked to show 7pm when Nandan came in with Neha. Rajeev noticed that she wasn’t wearing a bra.

“Nandan, were you sleeping in my room? “Rajeev asked.

“Yeah, we did” Neha replied.

This was one spicy electron, the wanna be nucleus Rajeev wanted to taste.

“I think you left something behind on my bed.” Rajeev said noticing that Nandan had gone to the toilet.

“Oh let me check.” Neha said and went in.

“Ah! My bra.” she said casually while coming out.

“Dumbo we forgot my bra in Raj’s room” Neha told Nandan as he came back.

Raj! She had a name for me Rajeev thought. He had to wait 19 years to hear the sweetest words he had ever heard all his life, Raj. Nandan pulled Neha into his room and said “Round 2 Raj!” and smiled.

Neha dropped her bra out, winked at him and whispered into Rajeev's ears “For you.”

The swimmers were out again and no soap was used this time.

The classes on the next day explained all about the force between the electron and nucleus and what was binding them. Rajeev smelt his hands more than a thousand times and ultimately found the explanation to the force of attraction.

“Prasad”

“Present sir”

“Rohit”

“Present sir”

“Rajeev”

“Raj! Sir, Raj, my name is Raj and I am present sir.” said Rajeev while a few girls giggled. Raj, the handsome engineer had arrived. Confidently he walked back home.

Neha sat with her legs crossed on the chair in the hall as the handsome Raj opened the door.

“Hi Neha, where is Nandan?”

“He’s gone out to get some milk”

“Oh, alright.”

Rajeev went into his room, removed his pants and was wearing his shorts when Neha pushed the door open and asked “Coffee?”

Rajeev stood shocked and managed the words “Ya sure”.

Neha had a nice look at this partially bare physique and whispered into his ears “that’s ok” and left.

Something was wrong, this could not happen. It seemed apocryphal and yet it was true. Rajeev secretly thanked his dad's decision to discuss his stay over a cup of coffee and for having met the FCUK Ganapati. It was his destiny, his good looks, a rich flat mate and a hot babe. Engineering had been his encyclopedia of sex.

Raj thought about Neha the whole of next day. The professor called him Raj all the time and the girls giggled.

That night Neha stayed back at Raj’s place. She looked stunning; she had worn the same pink bra with one of the straps peeping out. At 10.30 Nandan and Neha went in. Rajeev sat in the hall watching TV. The door closed behind them.

“I need water Nandan” said the voice and Neha came out drank water and went in, Rajeev didn’t look at her. She didn’t close the door this time. The electron was getting tastier. After 30 minutes, Raj got up from the bean bag and went near the door, he could see them. He could see what Neha wanted him to see and Neha could see “Raj”. All numbers except 69 did not matter. Rajeev locked himself in his room and slept.

It was pouring cats and dogs the next day. The power line had been cut off and was not to come for a whole night. Nandan was out. Rajeev read his newspaper under candle light. He answered the knock on the door. Neha was all drenched and wet. He looked for Nandan behind her.

“He is not here” Neha said and closed the door behind her.

Rajeev is screwed.

Chapter 2 : The Metamorphosis

3 Months Back.

“Indian College of Engineering”, a huge board read in front of Rajeev as he got down from the auto he was in along with his dad. The meter read eighteen rupees fifty paise and Rajeev’s dad promptly took the change one rupee fifty paise from the auto driver inviting cheap looks. There was a sense of pride in Rajeev as he walked into the campus. He would be an engineer in 4 years and a handsome one too! 6 years of water drawing activity in his house had given him a perfect body, good enough for every girl in the campus to invite a second look. The guy refused to get carried away and tried to figure out where the administrative office was. At some distance the temple bell rang changing the course of the visit to the admin block to be pushed after the Ganpati temple.

Rajeev believed in God as much as he believed in the purity of his character. His life was always surrounded by people who spoke the truth and did good deeds. Indian College of Engineering was a pleothra of unwanted characters. The prayers were strong and the steps more determined as they reached the Admin office.

“I’m sorry sir but I could not arrange for a room in the hostel for your son” said the clerk at the office in a very “bribed” way: the unwanted character.

The father and son duo decided to discuss the potential places of his stay over a cup of coffee. With Lord Murphy’s blessings in abundance, Lord Ganapati was nowhere to be seen. A man wearing shorts and a t-shirt which read “FCUK” served them a cup of tea and said “If you are looking for a room, please call on this number”. The tea was extra sweet.

“Nandan, His name is Nandan”

“Alright! Thank you so much!” said Rajeev.

Was this a re-incarnation of Lord Ganapti or was it still Murphy with a designer t-shirt? Nandan would have an answer. He did.

“Hi! Is this Nandan?”

“Ya! Do you want to share a flat with me?” came the reply. Definitely Ganapati, Rajeev thought.

It was a 2 bedroom house on the 3^rd floor of an apartment. The rent was 5000 rupees per month out of which Rajeev had to pay 2000 without any deposit, which meant Nandan was a rich chap. There were 18 posters of Angelina Jolie on the wall, 36 small ones on Nandan’s cupboard and a wallpaper of Miss Jolie on his desktop. Somewhere Mr Pitt was fuming .Nandan looked like a guy to whom puberty hit at around an age of 7 or 8. Screw Darwin and his theories. The guy could jerk off in front of dancing Madhuri Dixit wearing absolutely normal clothes on TV. This obviously meant he was without a girl in his life. “Sex aur Love mein sirf spelling ka difference hai!”, the jackass always said.

Rajeev had started enjoying Nandan’s company. In the first 15 days Rajeev knew everything about Miss Jolie, what 69 meant and how to jerk off.

It was Sunday, Nandan was not home. Rajeev was on his bed taking the mandatory afternoon nap. “Beedo dooji thali ka lage bada masaaledaar…” played loudly on Nandan’s desktop the password of which Rajeev already knew. The doorbell went “Buzzzzzzzzzzzzz…!!!”. The semi-naked Rajeev opened the door and was surprised to see a semi-naked girl standing. Nandan stood smiling behind her and said “Neha! Teri bhabhi!! Lol”

“Hi Neha, I’m Rajeev”

There were now 55 two dimensional photos of Angelina and one three dimensional version standing at the door.

“Neha!” whispered Rajeev as his testosterone level reached an all time high. She wore a pink top which read “Screw you! Look Up!”. The couple settled in the hall as Rajeev went in. Nandan now had a girlfriend. Neha, Neha Sharma. The semi naked girl who had carefully observed the semi clad Rajeev for a couple of minutes, had turned back and said “Impressive!” to her boyfriend. The Beedo song was now in loop and this is the 43^rd time it was being played. Neha was the most beautiful girl Rajeev had ever seen. Period.

“Coffee?” said Neha pushing his closed door.

“Oh! You! Ok! Half cup! Ya! ok !” said Rajeev shivering. The spelling difference hardly mattered now.

A hot cup of coffee and an extremely hot girl made up for all the cold waves Delhi was offering.

“Neha!” whispered Rajeev that night and plunged into deep sleep.

Rajeev is screwed.

Chapter 1 : The HIV Story

The walls of the hospital were covered with posters of HIV education and tips about protecting yourself from the dangers of AIDS. Rajeev sat on one of the chairs of the clinic facing a huge poster which read - "One life, One partner". People came to this clinic to get the final reports of their self destruction stories. "Fuck you!" , shouted Rajeev looking at the woman holding hands with her man, campaigning for the One life, One partner crap. His voice echoed through the clinic thrice.Nothing changed. The woman still smiled, the man still proud of his bitch. Nothing changed. AIDS was always a bad hangover of a screwed up relationship. The only difference was, it was never over. Rajeev could see the doctor far away holding a white envelope but refused to look at him directly. He could not resist. The doctor wore no expressions. He came, sat and kept the envelope aside.

"Do you smoke Rajeev?"

"Yes doctor", said Rajeev, practically guessing a smoke was his reward for fatal "insertion".

"Lets go!" said the doctor, leaving the report at the table.

The doctor and the patient crossed eleven "No Smoking" boards and finally reached a "Smoking Bay".

"What is in the report is something that I suspect most of the time. But today I'll tell you here that what is there in that report is something you rightly deserved. I never get personally involved with my patients but when I read your report I felt justice had been done. Please go ahead, take your report and move on." said the doctor stamping his stub.

Rajeev hurried to the clinic again, reached for the envelope and opened it.

Slowly he read and whispered " HIV +ve".